“Fear”

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WARNING: This video may potentially trigger seizures for people with photosensitive epilepsy. Viewer discretion is advised.

Song: “Fear Inoculum” by Tool

“Immunity, long overdue. Contagion, I exhale you.”

In thinking about sinusoidal patterns, I immediately thought of the work of artist, Alex Grey. Much of his work is inspired by toroidal energy and sacred geometry. He also does the album artwork for the psychedelic-metal band, Tool, which just released their first album in thirteen years, “Fear Inoculum.”

An inoculum is a vaccination. In listening to this album, in particular the first track, it feels as though you’re participating in a sacred chant to expel and immunize against fear. Over and over, the singer repeats the words, “inoculated, bless this immunity.” The music builds to a crescendo, then fades with this chant, backed by a mesmerizing synthetic riff. The listener feels a growing sense of anxiety, then a feeling of release. Like holding your breath, letting it flow throughout your body until your brain screams for oxygen, then exhaling.

This same sensation is practiced in meditation, yoga, long-distance running, dealing with new and scary situations…anything in life that requires determination and endurance. In moving through fear, you build an armor against it. You build an immunity to it.

I wanted to simulate this feeling with my animation. The animation begins with a pulsating spiral against a dark background. This is the beginning of the meditation. All is calm.

When you press the ‘F’ key, the animation changes to include an overlaid, black skull. This is the beginning of discomfort. The moment when your brain realizes that something is wrong.

Pressing the ‘E’ key will change the skull to a bright blue, harsh against the purple background. The eyes are spinning and pulsating. Something is definitely wrong. You’re on a long run, at the bottom of a swimming pool, sweating on stage in front of an audience.

The ‘A’ key changes the skull to an almost neon pink, contrasting even more with the background. Your muscles are screaming, you need to slow down. Your brain is crying out for oxygen. Your instincts tell you to run off stage.

‘R’ brings on the crescendo. The skull pulsates and spins, the colors shifting between various hues of pink, purple, and blue. This is that last push at the end of a run, the moment before you break the surface of a swimming pool, the final inhale before you begin speaking.

And then it’s over.

Pressing any other key will return the animation to the calming spiral. Next time, the fear will not be gone, but you will be ready.